Healing through the holidays: A guide to hope

KNOXVILLE, Tenn. (WVLT) - Inside Sequoyah Hills Presbyterian Church was a wave of silence, emotions, and dancing flames on candles that reflected the joy people once shared with loved ones.

The church hosted a special service Wednesday night for anyone needing hope, healing and peace this holiday season.

“A lot of people here are not feeling much joy,” said Ann Hitch, a Stephen Minister. “Sometimes, we make our lists too long and it brings us stress.”

This year is the first Christmas Sheila White is without her father who died around this time in 2021. She’s also a Stephen Minister who has had to lean on encouragement.

These leaders are trained to build confidential relationships with anyone struggling with grief or hardship. They have recognized that pain can get heavier around the holidays.

They’re encouraging people to not be alone this season if they can help it. They suggest people be honest about their true feelings and connect with someone who will listen.

“When you lose a parent, it’s a unique feeling, but my church family has been getting me through it,” White said.

According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, 64% of people with mental illness have once reported that the holidays make their conditions worse. The following are suggestions for anyone who wants to reduce stress and cultivate a healthy holiday:

- Take steps to stay safe.

- Accept your needs. Be kind to yourself! Put your own mental and physical well-being first. Recognize what your triggers are to help you prepare for stressful situations.

- Manage your time and don’t try to do too much.

- Be realistic. Even pre-pandemic, the happy lives of the people shown in those holiday commercials are fictional.

- Set boundaries. Family dynamics can be complex. Acknowledge them and accept that you can only control your role. If you need to, find ways to limit your exposure.

- Practice relaxation. Deep breathing, meditation and progressive muscle relaxation are good ways to calm yourself. Taking a break to refocus can have benefits beyond the immediate moment.

- Exercise daily.

- Eat well.

- Get enough sleep.

- Avoid alcohol and drugs.

- Spend time in nature.

- Volunteer.

- Find support.

Sequoyah Hills Presbyterian Church hosts 8-week grief share sessions every fall and spring.

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